If you’re on this site, and reading this article, chances are you’re looking for help. And chances are also you want to fix what’s wrong quickly, because you’re tired of it all.
If you struggle with anxiety, depression or disordered eating, and have been doing so for years, you might feel quite discouraged, especially if your efforts to make lasting change aren’t working. That is, if the things that used to work just don’t work anymore.
The tenacity of many mental health issues can wreak havoc on your spirit, as well as your body. And in my experience, both lived and with clients, the quickest fix is actually the slow and incremental one. It’s the one where you take one small step, and then another, and another, and so on. And if you fall down, or fall backwards, you’re just falling back a step or two.
Who wants to hear that real change can take time? Hardly anyone.
Chances are, this is not what you want to hear. Chances are, patience is not your strongest trait.
A lot of current mental health advice — especially on social media and the internet — is counting on that. So they can sell you something that works in x amount of time, or in just a few quick and easy steps. They try to make it simple, because they know people want to see results quickly, to keep up their momentum.
We live in a quick-fix society
where we’ve learned to expect quick fixes.
So we keep falling for them.
And failing with them.
All or most of these quick fixes will probably work for a while. And all are also probably not sustainable. Or maintainable.
So you reach your goal, and because you’ve gotten there quickly, you haven’t learned what you’ve needed to learn along the way – the difficult stuff, the stuff that created or contributed to the problem in the first place.
So, the changes don’t stay. And there you are, sinking to the bottom again. And all of this takes time, and energy, and costs a lot of self-esteem (not to mention money).
How much better to go at it slowly. Gradually. Learning what you need to learn along the way. So that you no longer need to repeat the old behaviors. In the long run, this is actually the fastest way to sanity and recovery.
So, fast — is actually slow, because it is a band-aid that won’t last.
And slow – is actually fast, because it is thorough. And sustainable.